Wednesday, June 8, 2011

A lot of different feelings tonight...

I was texting a friend, E, and she was letting me know that one of our mutual friends had miscarried. Saddened, as I had just hen through this myself, I told E to let her know that she cam call me if she would like.

Then I got to thinking. It seems like I have been through, me alone, so many things that my friends together have g through. Meaning that I suffer through these different things while each friend might have just one. My friend E has been blessed with such a healthy life, in fact most of my friends have. Me, my list is long.

1. Infertility
2. Postpartum Depression
3. Miscarriage
4. Endometriosis (though not officially diagnosed as I have not had surgery)
5. Gestational Diabeties
6. Neck sprain (whip lash)
7. bulged disk (and the treatment relating to number 6 and 7, including chiropractic care, trigger point injection, physical therapy, and permanent ownership of a cervical traction device)
8. Arthritis in the knees
9. Tendinitis in both thumbs, plus cortisone injection
10. Carpal tunnel syndrome, plus cortisone injections
11. Migraines
12. Anxiety
13. Talk therapy

And the list goes on. I'm like a book of been there done that. My friends have issues and it's like they all come to me for questions because I've already been through something similar. I'm not sure I like that.

Today I'm feeling really overwhelmed for various reasons. Mostly because of money, we have started getting in more bills for all my treatment regarding the accident. How I wish I could sue the girl that hit me. She has really inconvenienced my life. I really want to have words with her. I just pray everything sorts itself out. but until then, I'm feel like I'm stuck in an endless state of worry.

I'm also now in the TWW and I'm anxious in knowing if I'll be lucky enough to get pregnant two months in a row. While I'm glad I have clomid offered to me I'd rather not have to take it. I would rather not need help to get pregnant. So these next two weeks I am definitely going to be on the edge. Which is bad if I'm trying to relax and let my body be in the best state to conceive in. Ugh. Double edged sword.

All this just makes me so so tired.


  1. So why can't you sue the girl that hit you? Did you make a settlement with the insurance company? I'm sorry to hear that you are still suffering from that!

    I'm hoping that this month you get pregnant! I actually got pregnant with Michael the month after I had an early loss so hopefully it will be the same for you.

  2. I live in a no fault state. You can't sure for pain and suffering or damages unless they are deforming, loss of limbs, etc... I think we might be settling with their insurance, not sure yet.